Fear

Fear is an emotion that is capable of controlling your decisions and actions.  Recently, as I approach a time in my life where I will endure a lot of change, I have discovered the type of feelings fear can ignite.  It can force you to turn down great opportunites, take for granted your successes, and restrict you from experiencing the excitements in life.

For my entire life, I have been sheltered by my family, friends, and authorities.  I have created a routine that has allowed me to stay within my comfort zone. For years, I have returned to school in the fall, I have played soccer year-round, I have maintained many friendships, I have lived under my parents roof, I have gone on family vacations, and I have jumped from one job to the next.  After having something for so long, it is difficult to walk off that beaten path.  Don't get me wrong, I have ventured out of my limits by taking chances and learning from my mistakes, but I have always remained in close proximity with the people I love the most, the ones that support and love me back.

Now that I am graduating, I am leaving the school that has supported my education and extra curricular activities for the past 4 years, where I have developed many relationships with a diverse group of people.  Although the idea of graduating does not worry me, I have bits of fear that make me question what my future entails.  With my new job, I will be traveling a lot.  The feeling of independence excites me but I find myself scared when I think about being away from friends and family for long periods of time.  Since I have grown so dependent on them over the years, it is an uneasy feeling to know I will be distant from the communication channels I have created. 

As all these feelings envelop my thoughts, I have to find a way to overcome my fearful emotions.  If I were to let them control my life, I would jeopordize my chances of being succesful, of making new friends and establishing a family.     

Strong Would Be An Understatement

Recently, a kid I went to high school with was diagnosed with a very rare type of cancer, ALL.  There are only 10 other cases of it throughout the world which makes it very difficult for doctors to conduct the necessary research that provide them with vital information that could help cure the leukemia.  It started as little bumps on the side of his neck.  Everyone thought they were side effects to having mono, but obviously that diagnosis was incorrect.  Currently, after completing round one of chemotherapy, doctors say the cancer has been retracted from his body but its a possiblity he could go into remission.  Their best source to a fast, permanent recovery right now is to have a bone marrow transplant. 

Today, in Palmer, they had a bone marrow drive.  Over 100 people from town attended the drive at St. Thomas to support Matt and his family by donating DNA samples.  This was performed by rubbing cottom swabs along the inside of your cheek.  It was a fantastic turnout, lifting the spirits of the Ziemian family.  Now, we have to wait for the DNA samples to be analyzed as we all cross our fingers for a perfect match.

Incidents like this one make me step back and appreciate my good health.  And also to think twice before I complain.  Matt is an unbelievably strong individual who is fighting through this illness.  While he struggles with this cancer, he still finds in his heart to look out for others before himself.  I wish the best for him and hope there is someone out there who can donate in order to make a difference in his life.

http://www.wwlp.com/dpp/news/local/Bone-marrow-drive-helps-to-save-a-life

The Glamour of a Little Girl

Not all girls are raised in similar environments.  As a result, it's not certain that each one will transpire into the world of a stereotypical "girly-girl."  Some desire a much more unorganized and adventorous lifestyle.  Some even fall somewhere in the middle where they strive to be athletic and competitive but still enjoy to be pampered and beautiful.  Personally, that is where I have taken a seat on the bench of womanhood.  It may take quite a few years for most girls to find where they are comfortable in society and to know how to feel comfortable in their own skin.  Until then, it is an exciting experience to watch them transform and grow as individuals.

There are two little girls in my life, my cousin and a friend, that have looked up to me as a role model, and also a female who knows the ins and outs of fashion and beauty.  They have defined the meaning of being a "girly-girl."  Together, we updo our hair, paint our nails, apply our makeup and dress ourselves with the latest trends.  It is an exciting experience for all of us.  Luckily, they have brought me along with them on the journey of learning what makes them feel beautiful, but also what sets them apart from others.  It is fun for me to show them the ropes but also teach them a lesson on how to express themselves through inner beauty.

Unfortunately, it is very difficult for a young girl to grow up in this manipulating and judgemental society we live in.  There are high expectations set for the female gender that not everyone can live up to, depending on their standards of living and personal perspectives.  Some girls make it out alive, while others struggle to be accepting of their image.  Since I have experienced this first-hand, I do my best to help the younger generation survive the maturing stage a little bit easier than I was capable of doing.  The glamour of being a girl can be fun and entertaining but it is important to keep realism at an arm's length away.